no time at all

I haven't posted anything to this blog for quite a while ...and feel guilty even throwing up a comment now. How can time pass so quickly? There just is NEVER enough time to do all the things we want or need to do. Does anyone have any great ideas on how to manage time better? I could really use some good suggestions.

I really enjoyed taking time off when Mom was here - and would have liked to take even more - but the downside is that there is no one at work to pick up the slack when I am off - a real quandry when there are no other employees and not even the possibility of student help. Therefore, the daily work just accumulates and I end up working EXTRA to make up for being off. Kind of defeats the purpose of days off in my mind.

Big sigh!

chalk another one up for the miller clan

i find it a lot easier to post pictures of my grandkids or children on this blog than i do to actually put my thoughts out there. and i probably always will. so no deep thoughts - but i certainly do feel lucky this week. that may sound weird considering what we have gone through, but it could have been so much worse. when i first found bud convulsing, with his eyes rolled back and blood pouring out, i was terrified that what i was seeing was hemmorhaging from his brain. i thought the 'big one' - the massive stroke - had hit.

but it hadn't. and although bud is still - and always will be - at risk... he made it through one more time. more meds added to his regime - he needs to watch his pressure closer - he is more unstable and needs his cane - but he is recovering.

the kids were right there with him - family is wonderful. we are lucky - and blessed.

no good answers

...so everyone knows that bud was in the hospital - and the best guess so far is that he had another stroke. the left side of his face is not functioning properly - but we can only hope that he recovers the use of those muscles. meanwhile, it appears that we need to help and encourage him to make some changes in his lifestyle... anyone with good suggestions on how to facilitate this - please share.

more seriously...

Today I went to church and I went to work both. I wish I had only gone to church. I went in to work for two reasons. First, because I needed to catch up work because of missing while Bud was in the hospital, but secondly I went in to check up on student workers. I wish I hadn't. I find as the day draws to a close that I am infinitely depressed by what I see at work. My attitude towards the rest of the week is far from positive. If there is a bright note, however, it is that I have come to appreciate even more than usual, the work ethic and values of my own family more. Thanks to all of you for that.

wishful thinking

can you imagine ever forgetting moments like these?

I wish I had a movie camera. Now before anyone takes that so seriously that they think I am ASKING for one,

let me explain. I don't want one - i want my KIDS to USE theirs! I have been watching the grandkids a lot lately.

I am totally enamored of all their personality quirks, their speech patterns and even their fashion choices. But they are changing so quickly and I am afraid I will forget these moments! When Austin actually talks to piglet puppet as if he is real, and when he BECOMES tarzan and jumps from couch to chair to window…When Nayeli runs on her toes and tries to jump, and when she clenches her teeth or sings baby,baby, baby at the top of her lungs. When Karyna traverses every room on her back looking as if she is going to break her neck, or when she laughs out loud at Nayeli, or gives her own stare-down – which she does. When Reagan talks non-stop with her own language or almost kicks herself out of the bouncy seat and when she laughs and looks in mirrors. I may forget. And I don’t want to. I want them to be able to ‘see’ themselves when they are older. I remember specific gestures, traits and habits of Nick, Molly and Katie from when they were young. I can tell them what they were like – but how nice it would have been to have a video now to show Nick that he really DID watch TV on his head and run stiff legged. I wish Molly could SEE herself climbing out of the crib and yard and that Katie could see herself actually telling Nick and Molly what to do – and see how fast she was even really young. Get out the camera more often – the kids are changing daily! Although each step is fun and funny, I don't want to forget ANY -i hope we can save more of these memories.

the sun still shines

even though our pipes are still somewhat frozen (there was a tiny trickle this morning) and our washing machine is leaking. i want to let the sunshine into the house to brighten our february days, but the stinking temperature is still so cold and our windows leak air, so i have extra blankets, etc. covering our windows - giving the impression of a cave. if i wanted to be a bear this would be nice, but life is moving forward and hibernation is not an option.

i was looking over my calendar this morning and realized that it is filling up too quickly. in my quest for some organization in my life i have 'scheduled' more than i planned.

anyone up for a mid-winter cleaning of my upstairs rooms? i am not shooting for organized perfection, but just for entrance possibility. as of now you have to climb over two fans, three boxes, garbage bags of clothes and piles of gift bags - putting life and limb at risk with every move. i believe nick came close to that broken limb experience - or worse - when he tried to navigate down the stairs carrying a high chair. luckily none of the little ones were in the vicinity as the heavy and large chair came tumbling down ahead of and without him. so.......if you become bored and want to spend some saturday or sunday going through boxes and bags i will welcome all - and possibly feed?