my sides still ache

Tonight was a blast - totally and completely. From start to finish, i laughed all night long. I laughed at the stories during lunch/dinner (meaning we stayed in one place long enough for two meals) and then again at dinner/snack (another meal was necessary as we could NOT go home yet) - but also laughed so hard that tears were running down my face ... at 'Menopause, the Musical'. I highly recommend it to everyone, and sincerely hope to go see it again. AND, to go see it with Jude, Sue and Alice. What a hoot! When I wasn't rocking in the seat myself, I was watching Jude rolling forward, or Sue sliding down in her seat, or Alice clutching her side from laughing so much. The humor and songs in this show - and the facial expressions on the cast - wow - I had no idea menopause was so funny. But it sure is now!

I should have known the night would be hilarious, as from the moment we took our seats, Jude entertained us. She stood in front of the auditorium fanning us and occasionally dancing to the music. And yes, we were in the front row, (great seats - thanks again Alice) so everyone in the theatre got entertained by Jude also. Did you know that at the end of the show we all went up on stage to do a chorus line kick (except Alice - who I thought would surely join us!) Yep, lots of 'older' women dancing a chorus line. And hey, no one fell off the stage either.

Anyone reading this, if you get a chance to go see this musical, I would suggest you take the chance ... and call the rest of us and let us know - we will probably want to go again.

After watching this play, I no longer feel even slightly worried that I occasionally go to work with my clothes on inside out or backwards ...because it sounds like this is just another in a never-ending list of fun things EVERYONE does at sometime. ha ha - just another 'change' symptom to laugh at.

great times - great company - loved the day. thanks all.

so far behind

not only have i been behind in verbal blogging, but it has been a long time since pics posted too. i don't have time to put many on tonight, but here are a couple


Katie, Rick and Reagan enjoying pieces of duck cake (so cute) from Reagan's first b-day party.


The best thing about this picture of Bob, Austin and Molly is the way Austin is smiling at Dad.


Just realized that i had NO pictures of the WHOLE Miler family, but here are three of them. Karyna, Allison and Nick are just arriving for our family picture time on a COLD day.



There were definitely two people who enjoyed their time together after a month apart. Best friends forever - in some manner. They were excited to see each other from the first moment of arrival at my house, and squabbled barely at all the whole weekend.

of two minds

so i titled this entry "of two minds" knowing full well that for my kids, that would be opening myself up to quips and ridicule - smart remarks about how well my mind works at the best of times - but it is an apt title.

i have been trying to define my emotions to myself - about all the changes that have gone on in my life over the past summer - and i can't pin them down.

as an example - a good change is that all my SIX kids have now completed at least one college degree. i am thrilled - i am relieved and happy for them all - and yet i miss seeing them in my building. i ridiculously miss the late nights that i worked while keeping Nick company as he jammed two weeks worth of homework into a few LONG, LONG nights. i miss Katie stopping by when she would come by to pick up Rick or visit him between classes. it has been longer since Molly regularly was on campus, but it sure was fun when she worked down the hall. Cheryl's office has not been the same to me since Molly graduated.

was i an extremely lucky person to have all my kids around me for so long? YES!!!!!!!

since graduation, Katie and Rick moved and the easy stop by their apartment to see Reagan has ended. No more babysitting - and I really miss that. I even miss Katie chewing me out for leaving phone messages (i don't do that anymore). But they moved for a good reason - a wonderful new job that Rick wanted! They are buying a house - a great thing. So I am happy and sad too. I know this is a good step and they aren't going to be THAT far away, but it feels so different.

The same is true for Nick, Allison and the girls. I am so excited that Nick has gone on to a program he is thrilled to be a part of. I am happy that they found a wonderful place to live and that it is already beginning to feel like home. It is an amazing opportunity for them as a family - they will experience tons of new things - both good and bad - and grow through it all. The girls already like the new apartment. But when Nick talked about how St. Louis already felt like home, and how much he loved it there, I still had a little ache inside that no longer were we home.

and last, I am hoping and praying for the perfect FULL TIME job to happen for Bob. I am proud of how diligently he has worked towards his career, and I want him to also get the job he wants and deserves, but worry that it will be also away from here. Then we will have to struggle to be happy for yet another event that tears away at our life patterns.

so do I seem like i don't like change? honestly that is not it. I do like change ... in almost any other aspect of my life. why does it bother me? because i look at my own experience with my own immediate family. my parents and brothers moved away. do we still love each other - i would say yes, at least from my perspective, but are we as close as we could have been? no. are my kids as close to their cousins as they could have been? no, I don't think so. And i see that proximity does impact a lot.

will i let this bother me for long? i sure hope not. but i will be putting a lot of miles on my van.